"Being Shy
Don't Keep Your Head Down"

Being shy is a terrible thing, isn't it? You want so much to mingle and talk fearlessly with others, but for some reason you just can't. It's like your brain stops working when you're in a group of people and you feel like you don't fit in.

How do I know all this? Miss Shy used to be my middle name and to be honest I still prefer having one on one conversations with people, but I feel a lot more comfortable in groups as well.

I've learned that being shy is something that takes the joy out of being with other people. There's so much you could learn from being around others. You really miss out when you're shy.

"What Causes Shyness?"

I was listening to a web cast by Oprah and Eckhart Tolle when Eckhart explained what shyness really means. He said that being shy is being afraid of criticism. If you stay away from others, they can't criticize you and make you feel bad. They can't hurt you.

He also said something that really caught my attention and that is that self conscious people deep down wish that they could be superior. A lot of people who seem very confident, feel very inferior deep down. They are compensating for this feeling by acting "big".

Not let me ask you this; what do you get out of shyness? Are you afraid of being criticized? Are you afraid people might think you're not a nice person, that they won't like you?

Another question. Even if people think you're not nice or don't like you, why do you care? I stopped caring when my assertiveness instructor told me this.

One third of the people you meet, like you
One third of the people you meet, don't like you!
One third of the people you meet, don't even care whether you're alive or not, they'll forget you!

So why waste your time and energy trying to please all those people? There is nothing you can do to change their mind. It really is a waste of time!

The only person who should like you, is YOU!





Learn more about improving self esteem.

Return from Being Shy to Self Esteem
Return from Being Shy to the Home Page